Overweighted's Blog

weight loss, wls, food, running, excercise, diet, run, bypass

ONE YEAR October 22, 2010

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Today is my 1 year SURGIVERSARY!!  One year ago today I made the decision to alter my body and my life forever.  One year ago today I put 100% of my faith and hope into the hands of my surgeon to give me a tool that would ultimately help me to create a new life and future for myself.  I was given a tool.  Nothing more, nothing less.  I could then decide how I would use it.  Every day is a challenge and every day I try and make the best choices.  Sometimes I stumble and fall.  But I get right back up and try again.  I had run out of hope for myself.  I was morbidly obese.  I was sick with diabetes.  I knew it would ultimately kill me.  I chose to change my destiny.  I started moving my body.  I started believing that I could do it.  I would wake up and say to myself I can’t run today.  I am to tired.  I don’t feel good.  It’s to hot or cold out.  But then I would start bargaining with myself telling myself that I don’t have to run.  I can walk.  Just get up and walk.  That’s all you have to do.  Just walk.  And I would find when I did get up and walk.  I would start to run.  I would think, OK now you are running.  If I can’t run all the way, what’s the worst that could happen, maybe I have to walk back home.  No biggie.  But I didn’t walk back home.  I kept running, I pushed myself, I made deals, I thought about rewards, I threatened myself.  I screamed at myself “you will never have another Starbucks coffee again if you don’t keep going”.  I set up new challenges.   I told myself to keep putting one foot in front of the other.  I ran in darkness so no one would see me.  I wore my sunglasses so I would not have to make eye contact.  I kept my eyes down and stared at the ground.  Ten miles of staring at the ground.  I felt shame.  I felt inadequate.  Sometimes I cried.  But I kept going.  And here I am one year later.  I have so much more to do.  I am not 100% yet.  Maybe I never will be but I will continue to keep moving forward.  One foot in front of the other. 

Here are some before and afters!

This was 2006.  I thought I looked really good that day. that’s me on the right.

AND LOOK AT ME NOW!

10/2010

9/2010

  7/20108/2010

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FOOD DAYS! October 8, 2010

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So for the last 2 days at work we have had food days.  Yesterday our team brought in food for a baby shower.  And today the company supplied a catered lunch for Excellence in Customer Service Week.  I work for a very large insurance company.  So for the last 2 days I have had to struggle to get thru the workday without bingeing!  And guess what?  Hmm do you have a guess?  Well here it is people I have FAILED.  Actually failed miserably would be more accurate way to describe it.   So now I get to take myself thru the entire weekend carrying around the shame on my back like some kind of growth.  It feels like my big scarlet letter.  The fact that I have an unbelievable lack of self control is one thing.  The reality is that this junk food makes me literally sick.  I cannot eat it and function.  You would think that would stop me in my tracks.  But noooo it doesn’t.  When there is a laid out table on the other side of my little cubicle wall and I can not only rise up and take a peak, but smell it all day long and watch my co workers indulging.  Ahhh it makes me nuts.  So this now starts a weekend of damage control.  So instead of eating intuitively for the next couple of days I am going to have to really watch my caloric intake.  I had planned on a run tonight and then a long run on either Saturday or Sunday.  And of course I would love to get a Jazzercise class in.  My hubby is out of town for work so I am on my own this weekend.  Just me and my pups.  Hopefully that will help keep me in check!  I have 10 more   20 more pounds to lose.  Only I can control what goes in my mouth.  I am going to start crossing my fingers and hoping I find the willpower.  Ahh and note to self.  STOP EATING SUGAR STUPID!  That will be my new thing SESS. 

This is the remnant of the brownie I ate at after lunch:

Brownie you make me sick!

 I think I should also have this tattooed on my body:

 

Week in review October 2, 2010

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So here we are.  Ok so here I am.  One week post half marathon.  Last Saturday I was doing the biggest run thus far on my journey.  I was filled with excitement and the ultimate feeling of joy at my success.  Now exactly one week later I sit with my laptop in Starbucks reflecting.  So I decided instead of taking it easy for a week post race I would take on some new challenges.  I signed up for a 6 week BOOTCAMP!  I have never done a bootcamp class before. So as I sit here on this super hard wooden chair that is not even remotely comfortable to begin with I can feel each and every one of my muscles in my oh soooo sore bottom and legs.  I ache.  I WANT Advil.  However I  have an extreme sensitivity to ibuprofen now since my stomach surgery, so that is not an option.  So I guess I have to embrace the ache!  No pain no gain…um NOT.  Thank goodness we know that is not the case anymore.  But anyway this is an overview of the last 7 days:

Saturday – 1/2 marathon

Sunday – Rest

Monday – 3 mile run

Tuesday – Bootcamp

Wednesday – Jazzercise

Thursday – Bootcamp

Friday – Jazzercise

 

And today I woke up to cold and drizzle  So far nothing today.  But I am thinking a good run this afternoon would be great.  Or I go rent a couple of movies and go home and get in my cozies and relax.  Tomorrow may be a better day for a run. I am happy to have some extra flexibility in my schedule so that I don’t feel like I HAVE to only run.  That I can do some other cross training activities without feeling like I have varied from my running schedule.  I have wanted to try a Bootcamp for a while and I have been looking into a kickboxing class.  This is the first time in my life that I feel like I am physically fit enough to take these classes and do well.  However I think I have to spend some time looking for a new goal.  I want to keep my running up so that I don’t get sidetracked.  I want to spend some time now working on speed.  Ohh that is hard with muscles so sore that it hurts to bend down and tie my shoes.  I just need a few extra hours in the day to fit everything in.  Other people seem to manage so why not me?    Work, house, husband, animals, excercise.  Repeat.  Notice there is no mention of friends or socializing.  Where is the time?  I mean really?  I am not even trying to be dramatic.  But by the time I do everything during the week by the time the weekend comes I am tired.  The last thing I want to even think about is the pressures of actually getting myself together to commit to any social activities.  I need to find some friends that I can work out or run with.  That would help.  I am thinking of joining the gym near my house for the winter.  I know that my outdoor activities are going to be extremely limited here, so in order to get in my miles I am going to have to depend on the treadmill.  Or else move.  Hehe it sounds funny but you never know.

 

 

 

ANOTHER MILESTONE September 26, 2010

Check one more item off the list.  Yesterday I completed my first HALF MARATHON.  That’s right shout it from the rooftops people.  I did it.  And after all my anxiety I DID IT WELL!  Yes I am proud.  My official time 2:42:17.  My goal had been 2:45 so there ya go.  My brother Len did the run with me.  He ran every step of the way with me and we finished together.  It was awesome.  It was the Arkon Roadrunner Marathon in Akron, Ohio.   As we ran I reflected on how far I have come in the last year.  One year ago I could not run for 30 seconds at a time.  That is where I started.  Run for 30 seconds and then walk.  And then work myself up to running for 1 minute and then walk.  And then run for 1 entire song.   And then walk…..And then I did my first 5K.  And then my first 10K.  And now my first Half Marathon.  I am proud to say that we did not walk one time.  We kept going one foot in front of the other.  That has always been my goal NO WALKING.  And I did it.  It was exciting and emotional and just fun.  I could not believe how well I paced myself.  I paid close attention to my hear rate and tried to not exceed my peak.  My breathing was perfect I could talk without to much trouble and I felt GREAT.  I felt way better than on my training runs.  I also ran the entire thing with no music.  I had my ipod on and headphones in all set but I never turned it on at all.  I wanted to be “in” the moment. I wanted to hear everything around me.  Other runners talking, the sound of my own breathing.  The echos of feet hitting the pavement.  The thick adrenaline in the air.  My raggedy breathing as I was getting up the last hills in the 11th mile….it was a 5% grade.  The digging way down the not stopping.  I wanted to hear all of that.  I did not want to lose myself in the music this time.  This time, my first time, I wanted to be there 100%.  I know that there will be more goals in the future and I know I will always be looking for my PR’s now.  But this time on September 25,2010 will always be at the very top of my accomplishments.  I worked really hard for it.  And now I have the medal to prove it!  YAY! YAY! YAY!

marathon 2

marathon 1

marathon medal Of course I will post the professional photos from race day as soon as they are available. These were just taken from my phone.  Of course we ran off at 5:30am with dead batteries in our camera.  Oh well!

 

RANDOM VACATION PICS September 25, 2010

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416           422

504 056

026

 

We interupt the regularly scheduled programing September 21, 2010

Ok so although I love working on my vacation blogs and posting lots o’ pictures.  I have to interrupt and talk about my upcoming half marathon.  This Saturday September 25th I am running my first half!!  I am already a bundle of nerves.  I am worried.  About a lot of things.  I know that I can finish it.  I have been training for a long time.  My training runs have taken me up to 11 miles.  I know that come hell or high water I will make it to the finish.  If I have to crawl I will do it!  I am simply afraid of not doing it well.  I am afraid of totally blowing my time and embarrassing myself I am worried about simply not being good  enough.  I drove the route last Sunday and there are a lot more hills than I ever expected.  BIG HILLS!  My brother is coming down from Michigan to run it with me.  I have been looking forward to this for so long and have myself so jacked up about it.  Can you say ADRENALINE???  My stomach is in knots already…how will I be come race day?  I am worried.  If anyone happens to read this and has any experience at all on this I would love it if you could give me some hints on how to calm my nerves.  I am sure I will post about this again before Sunday but I just wanted to put this out there!

 

ST. THOMAS, US VIRGIN ISLAND September 19, 2010

WOW!!!  Can’t say much more than that.  This island really is paradise.  What a great time we had here.  I think it will most likely take a couple of posts to share all my photos and everything we did while we were there.  Our entire family thought this was by far the best day spent on vacation.  So I hope you enjoy the photos.

 

180 WHY YES WE ARE TOURISTS!!

183 182

189

203 There were lot’s of these guys hanging around…and by these guys I don’t mean hubbies!

211 

This is a pic of a cemetary.  I am not gonna lie I found it somewhat creepy!

 

213

227

241   230 The buildings and the architecture are amazing.  I had a lot of fun taking random pics.

 

245   239

We walked down the above alley and just by chance found a great place for lunch!  It was a gem of a place hidden away. 

246 249

248 This was some of the best chips and guac I have ever had.  The chips were home made and nothing I was familiar with but excellent.  If you are ever in St. Thomas make your way to  Gladys’ Cafe you will not be dissapointed.  So I will end this post here and continue my St. Thomas trip on the next one.